TOP TEN LITTLE-KNOWN HUMOROUS REMARKS IN HISTORY

10) “Finally!  Where were you during that dreadful second act?”: Abe Lincoln, espying John Wilkes Booth aiming a pistol his way at Ford’s Theatre.

  9) “That’s it, I can’t go out tonight with my hair looking like this!”: Medusa on any given evening.

  8) “Is it me or is it hot in here?”: Hitler just after his death, scoping out the new digs.

  7) “Pablo, have you been raiding the acid cabinet again?”:  Picasso’s wife’s reaction at the start of his cubism period.

  6) “Sorry, I’ve gotta take this other call.”: Thomas Watson’s response to Alexander Graham Bell’s historic first telephone call.

  5) “Hey, man, you lost me at E.”: Einstein’s friend after receiving Albert’s explanation for his Theory of Special Relativity.

  4) “You had one job!”: Caesar’s last words to his bodyguard on the Ides of March.

  3) “Alright, fess up; who had the broccoli?”: Odysseus to his men while they waited inside the Trojan Horse.

2)    “Right, like anyone’s ever gonna remember any of my other stands now!": Custer, towards the close of his “Last Stand”.

And the number one little-known humorous remark in history:

  1)  “Dude, you’re killin’ me here.”: Abel’s last words to Cain.