TOP TEN INDICATIONS THAT YOU JUST MIGHT BE TOO MAD

10) You're poised in a three-point stance, helmet and pads on, mouth open, eyes totally buggin', chompin' at the bit to make a tackle, only there is no game, you're not on the field and it's been, like, forty-five minutes now.

9) You've been yelling nonstop for two-plus hours... at your goldfish.

8) Four out of five wet hens concurred, the lone holdout abstaining 'cause it didn't want to further upset you.

7) From all accounts your outside voice has become your inside voice.

6) Your reaction to your surprise party was "Blow it out your ass!!"

5) Twice today you actually spit nails. And not the little finishing ones. We're talkin' galvanized spikes.

4) Your therapist suspended your session early... from the safe confines of his panic room.

3) Tomorrow marks three weeks since you've last been able to see straight.

2) Mel Gibson, Naomi Campbell and John McEnroe unanimously agreed that, indeed, you were too mad.

And the top ten indication that you just might be too mad:

1) You haven't once mentioned that it's Friday and you love Fridays!