When Dashing Had Its Day
There’s no dashing anymore. Not really. Oh, sure, you still have the Usain Bolts of the world who can scamper a hundred meters in the time it takes you or I to get up off the couch and, okay, let’s not forget the DoorDash deliverers, those scrappy little independent contractors who inevitably arrive with the medium gluten-free pepperoni pizza and a small chai tea when you specifically ordered a double bacon burger, onion rings and a Diet Coke the size of Rhode Island. And, indeed, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention those able-bodied peeps who have enough get-up-and-go to step out and attend a local eatery, chowing down unabashedly while chatting it up with nearby patrons and the wait staff before ordering that second expensive bottle of Bordeaux and then pulling the ol’ “dine and dash” as the unsuspecting server excitedly runs to the wine cellar, mentally tallying up his expected generous gratuity. But, yeah, that’s not the “dashing” I’m talkin’ about.
I’m talkin’ about that really cool kind of “dashing”. The kind that was so prevalent decades ago, exhibited by bigger-than-life actors in the form of Clark Gable, Marlon Brando, James Dean, and Paul Newman. They had the whole package: looks, bravado, confidence, style and charm. And especially, a flair for adventure. Every guy wanted to be like them and every woman wanted to be with them. So, yeah, “dashing” was the perfect description, with just the utterance of the word somehow conjuring up excitement. There was a certain urbanity and sophistication coupled with an edginess and overall feeling that whatever these guys did, they couldn’t miss. They had it all under control. Easy peasy. And now?... Now we’ve got Brad Pitt, Idris Elba, Hugh Jackman, or even Tom Cruise (ya know, until the Oprah couch-bouncing incident). The difference being that, while these guys are obviously good-lookin’ and capable of holding their own during a late-night talk show interview--and, granted, all recipients of the moniker, “People’s Sexiest Man Alive”—the dashing thing?... yeah, it’s just not happenin’.
Turns out, “dashing” has been around for a really long time, originating in the early 13th century, initially meaning “to impel forward” or “to strike”. It wasn’t until the 17th century that it came to mean “military men full of vigor and energy”, before making its way to today’s accepted definition: “someone attractive, stylish, or full of energy”, a hundred years later, where it enjoyed notable status until roughly the 1960s. And now, unfortunately, its usage is pretty much defunct, relegated to the scrap heap of once exhilarating words like ululating, peregrinating, and fustigating (trust me, they were huge in their day), all a product of yesteryear when bigger than life characters dominated literature, the movies, and even the society pages. Unfortunately, in modern times, when undaunted detectives braving their lives to solve a mystery are substituted by Frank Drebin in “The Naked Gun” movies or sword-wielding swashbucklers are replaced by tunic-clad, hero-wannabes sporting glow-in-the-dark lightsabers in the “Star Wars” franchise, any real hopes of being dashing are… dashed (yeah, I went there).
But, hey, “dashing” had a good run, bringing us the likes of Robert Redford as the great Jay Gatsby, Sean Connery’s “Bond… James Bond”, Bogey’s hard-boiled PI, Philip Marlowe, and, of course, Clark Gable’s portrayal of Rhett “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn” Butler. So, yeah, you can always check out Turner Classic Movies if you’re feeling nostalgic for the days when men were men and women were… women, I guess. Or you can move forward and discover the next exciting personification of coolness that captures the American zeitgeist, be it the angst-ridden Joker in the Batman franchise or Ryan Reynolds rendition of Wade Wilson, the foul-mouthed mercenary in the Deadpool flicks. Or even cooler… those part- human, part-Na’vi creatures in the Avatar series. I mean, who needs dashing when you’ve got genetically engineered human-Na’vi hybrids, eh?
Oh, and not to worry, if you’re one of those people who just like the sound of “dash” and all its iterations (and who isn’t, right?), the word’s not going anywhere. Each yuletide season, you can still expect Santa to be dashing through the snow, his sidekick, Dasher, helping lead the way. And whatever they come up with for futuristic cars, just know that your RPMs, speedometer and fuel gauge will be ever present on your dash. Likewise, those salt free seasoning blends, compliments of Mrs. Dash; yeah, they’re here to stay. Oh, and those times you end up in the midst of a mad dash, late for an appointment, dashing off a quick text saying you’ll be there in a dash?... hell, you just know that’s gonna keep happening. But, the days of those dashing rogue characters we all grew up on?... sorry, but their time has come and gone… Anyway, gotta dash (yeah, I did it again).