The Niceties of Life

Certain words just sort of ease their way into our language and stay there with nary a chance of becoming defunct. They're innocuous to the point of near invisibility and yet never seem to be hurting for airplay. And yeah, they have more than their fair share of synonyms, all adding an extra layer of tone, complexion or shading to their meaning but, be assured, the reason these types of words make it on their own is because they are so prosaic. Totally humdrum. Downright namby-pamby. They're oftentimes a lone syllable, their pronunciation rolling off the tongue effortlessly, devoid of any harsh "K' sounds that might raise one's hackles. Just a pleasant resonance that lets everyone within hearing distance know that everything's gonna be okay. All is well. Nothin' to see here, folks. And in this day and age with F-bombs being dropped more frequently than dishes by a clumsy plate spinner (took a shot; didn't work... sorry), these quainter terms seem even more necessary in order to sustain an aura of auricular balance. I have one in particular that I'm referring to here.

Indeed, the attraction for the actual word I'm talkin' about is that it can be used in a variety of settings, the way it's uttered making all the difference in the world as to how people relate to it. It's kind of like tofu, nothing much to speak of when working alone but pair it up with other flavors and it becomes the perfect ingredient en route to a winning recipe. Think of it as that insightful host or hostess at a dinner party, constantly guiding others into the conversation with their take on a particular subject, carefully reading the room and then deftly changing the topic to include a multitude of different opinions and stimulating takes on the theme. And think of it as being so adroit at it that you hardly know it's there. A lot of thinkin' for a little word, right?

And yeah, it'd be nice if I finally divulged said word instead of constantly referring to it, as yet unnamed, well into the third paragraph. Enough with the tease; time to cough it up, pal, is no doubt, what you're thinkin'. Nice try, but first a couple more points of interest: It's basically an adjective but can also be an interjection, ya know, like "wow" or "huh"--an abrupt remark used as an aside or interruption that can stand on its own. And this expression is off-the-charts versatile, while able to describe a person's satisfaction it can also speak to being good-natured. And it can be all about refined behavior or, if necessary, relating to being delicate and meticulous. Lesser known variations have it indicating high standards or suggesting food that is pleasant to the taste, even alluding to a genteel or pompous code of conduct. Nice resume, right? It's what the Beach Boys were referring to when they sang, "Wouldn't It Be Nice". So, yeah, it's "nice", a word used three times earlier in this paragraph and yet probably not noticed because, as stated earlier, it's "innocuous to the point of invisibility".

A little history: Interestingly, "nice" didn't start out as a nice word at all, changing dramatically over time. Back in the 12th century, this Latin word meant “clumsy, weak or simple", somehow morphing into "fussy, dainty and delicate" a few hundred years later, before taking on an "agreeable and delightful" connotation in the 19th century, finally landing on today's "kind and thoughtful" definition. Sounds like a lot of serious lobbying over the years. And, actually, it was. It seems women really latched onto the usage, slowly converting its derogatory meanings into a disseminator of vague and mild agreeableness. I couldn't find any good reason why they took this word under their wing but I'm thinkin' it had to be as simple as they just liked the sound of it, the perfect term to toss in out of the blue, never coming in too hot. Never ruffling any feathers. Never raising an eyebrow. Just a non-partisan entity. As neutral as Switzerland.

And like I said out of the gate, this word isn't going away. How could it; it's managed to wheedle, cajole and sweet-talk its way into so many elements of our lives we'd be lost without it. Especially men: There'd be "No more Mr. Nice Guy", no "nice guys finishing last", no saying "it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy". No more daily pleasantries: "Nice weather we're having", "nice dress you have on", "nice to meet you", "have a nice day"; "I had a nice time". No public flattery: "Nice shot!"; "Nice try!"; "Nice game!"... There'd be no more "playing nice", no more mixing it up with a "nice change of pace", no more knowing it's "nice to know" and forget about ever having it "nice and easy" again. And when it comes to classic movie lines, say goodbye to Hannibal Lecter's "I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti". Oh yeah, and did I mention it's not just an adjective, that it can also be used as an interjection?... Nice!